“‘So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God.’ Romans 8:8 (NKJV)

My flesh longs for one thing,
Abba, You long for another.
I know Your love language is obedience,
I learned that through Your Son,
through Your Word.

But this flesh…
It wraps around me like the largest organ of my body,
skin from dust,
the very form that gives me authority on this earth,
yet the same form that chains me from Your will.

To govern my flesh,
I must surrender my will.
To surrender my will,
I must overcome my flesh.
But the very flesh I seek to govern
is the very thing that resists surrender.

It’s a cycle…
constraining, exhausting,
limiting my authority in the very place
where flesh gives me authority.

So, I cry for help.
And You send it.
I see it.
But this flesh,
the very thing I’m praying against,
delays my grasp of the help You give
until it lingers, fades,
passes like a mist in the wind.

Then it feels like You did not answer,
but You did,
it’s just that my enemy is a part of me.

The cure is clear:
I must die.
Die to what entices me.
But dying is not easy
when what kills me
feels like life.

It is a vicious cycle,
not because You are cruel,
but because the flesh is.
indeed…
a vicious cycle.

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